This is my favorite quote about life and I apply it to my work as a lawyer:
“We are not human beings having a spiritual experience; we are spiritual beings having a human experience.” Pierre Teilhard de Chardin
As a lawyer, I solve problems in Texas Courts … often, problems not solved by other lawyers.
I’m a family lawyer because I love family law — it’s broad, deep, exciting and often complicated. It’s high-stakes in a highly personal way. There’s no wealth to shift from an insurance company to an accident victim, or from a corporation to an injured worker, etc.
It’s about mom, dad, their baby and their tomorrows: their paths, together.
That motivates me because, in my opinion, parent-child relationships entail spiritual lessons for us at the soul level. We are spirit beings involved in human struggles which shape/instruct our souls.
The most rewarding experiences in my career have come from helping parents to protect their kids. I’ve been a divorcing Dad with a very young daughter (who is still my heart and soul, 17 years later). So I sympathize with the Mom or Dad who simply seeks to secure that eternal bond.
My role is to work harder and smarter than any other lawyer on your behalf. Advocacy is what I prefer. Working for you is what makes me want to come to work every day.
Here are some war stories:
A client who’d paid child support for several years for a child who was not his was released from that burden through a successful Bill of Review on paternity. Routinely, many of my Dad clients obtain or retain custody of their children. Who says Dads can’t nurture?
In 2016-2019, I represented at least a dozen dads who won primary or equal custody of their children. I love my Dads.
Fathers Fighting the Idiocracy
But the Age of Men passed awhile ago. Most judges in Harris County are female. Soon enough, most lawyers will be female. Women already outnumber men in colleges by about 7 to 3. More women have jobs than do men. Yet, Programmed Media paints a different, dystopian picture: “We MUST! get more of our daughters into STEM!” they drone.
Instead, I say that we need to get more of our sons into jobs that don’t require that they carry shovels, guns and trash.
Men must withstand the very real poison of an angry, unhinged matriarchy. If men don’t demand a place at the table — and fight the Partisan Tripe that imagines ‘glass ceilings‘ and a female majority doesn’t already receive equal pay for equal work — there won’t be any social hashtag movement to grieve the injustice.
Men don’t whine. Instead, we mollify the shrill, crass majority. We tell each other, Just man up!
We’ll view yet another disingenuous, fawning commercial touting PowerfulWomen! and, ugh, GirlPower! … while our brothers of every color are displaced from opportunity.
But, alas, what about the Dads who don’t seek gainful employment to support their kids? Should anyone care? My sense is, hell yes, we should: the roles of Father and Mother are mystical, not mythical. Each matters. The tie that binds parent and child is not a cliché.
Can you blame any man who acts as if he’s irrelevant? Media, culture and the coarse feminine majority tell him as much throughout his life. It’s standard programming.
He attends preschools and primary schools whose staff and administration is 80% female, where he’s treated like an alien species. As an adolescent, he’s surrounded by media that glorifies remote, fatuous sports and entertainment diversions for grown men and, yet, very positive, meaningful roles for girls and women. He then visits colleges and universities lead by utterly mediocre hominids with sham Ph.D.’s, blathering that he’s toxic.
But it’s the culture that’s toxic. Not really woke, but quite dope(ish), indeed.
Resist the idiocracy: Dads always matter — now, more than ever.
Recently, a client who was a devoted, dedicated mother (and veteran) overcame a horrible stereotype to regain possession of her 6-month old child. We fought (and beat) Big Law to win that one.
Likewise, many of my happiest Mom clients once thought that they’d been isolated from bank accounts and the capacity to hire a good lawyer. But it just takes a dedicated, persistent lawyer to stand up to a Bully and ask that a court enforce marital property law. I enjoy being that lawyer.
Moms Fighting the Sisterhood Bullies
Regardless of which party’s ‘wave’ of infantile souls controls the bench, all parents of daughters already know that girls are typically more cruel to other girls than the boys are. In an evolutionary sense, that’s logical, of course. But social programming promoting a vulgar feminine magnifies the problem.
Experience tells me that girl bullies get away with being mean, and that their capacity for cruelty is valued as a strength instead of the deep confusion that it represents.
Thus, in a courtroom, it’s important that Mom prepare herself to, indeed, fight whenever she goes to battle for her child. It does not matter that your judge is female, that the opposing lawyer and the Amicus are females, or that the mediator is a female. As the father of a daughter, please hear me: the clip art in media does not accurately portray the reception you’ll get from people who derive meaning by wielding power.
Other women will condemn you as a Slut! or a Nut! quicker than a man. Then, they’ll cackle that they’ve saved a ‘sister’ by doing so. Women get terribly confused in this society. The love of power only exacerbates the confusion.
Indeed, those who trumpet Change! and cantillate GirlPower! are utterly insincere — they’re great at cliches, but weak on results.
You’re a mom and you love your child. You’re not an empty interest group. Your access to your child is a right, not a sales-pitch.
The Power! Sickness & Bully Court
Regardless of the mix of masculine and feminine energy, the blind pursuit of money, status and any low-vibration, base desire, changes us. The social climber (Activist!) becomes less-than-human by insisting that he/she knows what’s best for other humans. That’s a universal phenomena.
In truth, people who seek power over others are obsessed with being ‘more than‘ others. Their powerful! labels are merely ideological flatulence (tolerance, diversity, or, god forbid, ‘leadership‘). It’s empty language — word porn — translating into nothingness for people who don’t share the obsession with social positioning.
As souls, most of us won’t have a singular, selfish obsession with social status. But the childish, fearful souls who demand! social power cannot understand that at all.
Phones off, no gum chewing, no talking and no reading in court!
Unfortunately, weak, unevolved souls dominate politics, religion, media and every institution, including courts. Bottom feeders dominate all cultural power structures. Apparently, they must learn that social power struggles reflect fear — the ultimate human weakness. The obstacle (fear, expressed through power) is the path to their evolution.
It’s natural for us to judge everything and share our version of ‘good’ news with others. But the universal human tendency to impose our personal will upon our neighbors — whether in the name of god, policy or justice — is not a good thing. We interfere with their path.
As the proverb suggests, it’s because the wicked (the weak) accuse, that the just must necessarily defend.
Courts are not filled with souls seeking justice. Rather, courts are filled with souls seeking to impose justice, whatever that means to them. Courts are the culmination of social order, which is itself the culmination of one person’s triumph (imposition) over another.
So don’t trust your social programming. We are spiritual beings stuck in human conflict who can, and should, have equal access to our children. It’s our chosen destiny.
You are your child’s only mom — that’s always worth fighting for. Your child, your right, your futures.
But the basis for your battle plan must be the law and due process, as we know it, now.
Resist the bully, she’s not your friend: Moms always matter.
After the Fact: You Got Next, If You Choose It
If you already surrendered to the bullying once, then maybe I can still help you. I can certainly help the defeated Mom or defeated Dad plan another battle for another day. The keys to tomorrow’s fight (that is, child custody modification) are:
1. cooperate with the judge’s order in the meantime;
2. practice silence as power with your ex; and
3. don’t engage (or act) crazy.
Let your opponent have the room he/she needs to sabatoge themselves. They’ll likely do it.
See 3 Rules for Success in Family Court Litigation on this website.
The day for fighting your custody case anew will come — it always, inexplicably does. My view is that you should do the following if you want that day to come:
1. prepare for the next fight;
2. contemplate the next fight; and,
3. remain open to allowing the day to pass without starting another fight.
If there is a path for you to win, I can help you find it.
But the better way to live life is to assure that it’s always the right journey.
In other recent cases, Clients raising an undocumented child since her birth successfully navigated international notice provisions to attain conservatorship and protection for their child.
In a pro bono case, a disabled client saved her home, along with the home of her disabled adult child, through combined persistent actions in both Probate Court and Civil District Court.
In another well-publicized pro bono case, a Client ‘without a country’ who struggled for a decade to navigate State and Federal courts as a ‘foundling’ finally attained documentation. A smarter lawyer finished that fight, but I was credited with an assist. Glad to help!
Costs for the Journey
I love my work. But the law is a jealous (unforgiving) mistress. It’s difficult for me to impress upon others that the life of a self-employed lawyer can be utterly frustrating and exhausting.
But the price is worth it because I value living the examined life. Alas, however, I am neither dope, woke, nor are my services inexpensive. I charge $350.00 to $400.00 per hour, along with a 4- to- 5-digit ‘evergreen’ retainer.
I want to fight the Dark Side of the Force with you. But even Han Solo had to pay the Empire’s self-employment taxes.
I am grateful for the lessons my clients have taught me. The clientele which made me has been diverse, including skin tones having every degree of melatonin and souls expressing all manner of beliefs (including, None). I love and serve my gay, lesbian and trans brothers and sisters as fervently as ‘cis normative’ kin folk.
But, that said, let’s endeavor to avoid further labels limiting who we are. We each have our journey.
When we start the journey in my office, we strive to see one another as we truly are. That’s because, I think, the journey is about connection and soul growth, not fear-based power struggles. Let the kids amuse themselves with their labels and their nomenclature, as if either endures.
You can always step off that playground.
If you hire me, I’ll help you as much as I can.
There may be a shared journey ahead for us.
If so, I’ll need to step inside to find the path.
- Graduate: University of Houston (1988) and University of Houston Law Center (1991)
- Licensed to practice law in Texas since May 1, 1992
- Mediator since 1999
- Successfully argued before the Supreme Court of Texas in 2000; came close in 2012/13.
- Associate Judge, City of Houston — 2005-2011
- Certified as a Parenting Coordinator & Facilitator since 2014
- Born in Sinton, Texas and grew up in Refugio and Corpus Christi. Graduate of Calallen High School (1982). Student Senator, Student Senate Speaker and Student Body President at UH. My undergraduate degrees are Bachelor of Sciences in both Political Science and Psychology.
- Devoted hiker and explorer.
- One child, Anna: when my child finally breathed, god gave me new life.